I am a drunk dialer.
I have a problem.
My liver hurts.
I have hairy feet.
I wear pleated pants.
Sadly Only 2 of those statements are related, and no one has punched me in the liver today.
Lately I have been living my life through the bottom of a bottle. At some point it is going to catch up to me and slap me around. I am not slippery like a ferret.
There are 2 things that I do know for sure.
The best pre hangover food - garlic bread.
The best post hangover food - fresh pineapple
I just need some pineapple now.